Speaker 1: 0:00

Next up on Soul Level, human.

Speaker 2: 0:02

When someone offered me what seemed like the key to freedom, I was like yes, because I didn't trust my own sense of sovereignty. I didn't trust that my intuition was going to lead me to my own idea of what freedom was for me.

Speaker 1: 0:19

If we're looking around in survival state and anxiety, with the fire hose of information coming at us. We cannot rely on the external to be our foundation. We just can't. We're going to be our own foundation. I don't believe that there is a job too small for the soul level revolution. I feel like if we just tap into where our gifts are and where we're being led, we're going to automatically be used for a greater purpose. You didn't come here to play safe. You came to remember your power and build what comes next. We're going to automatically be used for a greater purpose. You didn't come here to bypass the chaos. You came here to lead through it. Before we get into today's episode, I just want to take a minute and acknowledge where we are.

Speaker 1: 1:19

Yesterday was the no Kings protest across the country, with record-breaking turnout. People showed up in person, in public, en masse, to say people showed up in person, in public, en masse, to say we don't want Donald Trump, we don't want authoritarianism. We are America. We threw tea in a harbor for less and we grew up pledging our allegiance to a flag every single day that promised liberty and justice for all. So if you're one of the people who showed up, either physically or in spirit yesterday. I want to thank you and I want to remind you this is why we do the work. Spiritual awakening isn't about bypassing the world or hiding from hard things. It's about being brave enough to stay engaged, to use your voice to be fully seen, to stick up for others, even and especially when it's dangerous, to embody your most courageous soul level, self anchoring the highest timeline, even when everything in the 3D world around you feels scary. Let yesterday energize you, gary. Let yesterday energize you. It may be extremely dark right now, but, like Vice President Kamala Harris said, let us fill the sky with the light of a billion brilliant stars. And that actually leads us right into today's conversation.

Speaker 1: 2:42

I'm joined by Allison May Byrne, survivor advocate for victims of intimate partner and gender-based violence, and strategist and a witch With a background in law, civil rights and esoteric studies. She blends the practical with the mystical, teaching others how to wield perception, presence and influence with integrity. Allison brings a unique perspective to the messy middle, helping people navigate collapse, nervous system survival and reclaim their own authority in a world that craves authenticity but suppresses it, especially in a time when the values we were taught to believe in are being twisted to mean the exact opposite. Let's drop in Welcome. Thank you so much. I'm so excited to talk to you. I'm excited too. I have been stalking you on TikTok. God bless TikTok for showing me all the cool people.

Speaker 2: 3:40

Seriously, isn't that true? I love it. There's things I love about it and some things I don't.

Speaker 1: 3:44

Yes, Just like every tool, it has its ups and downs. When I first started stalking you not creepy at all, you were working for a law firm and then, something happened there.

Speaker 2: 3:58

Catch me up Okay.

Speaker 2: 4:00

So I have been working in the legal field or I was working in the legal field for like a decade 10 years I worked. This is very parallel to my spiritual journey. I got into law after a really abusive marriage and my divorce lawyer ended up being the first lawyer I worked for I was in the arts and she was like you're kind of good at this, do you want to like explore this as a possibility? And she was like the first woman I'd ever seen who owned her own business. I was like, yes, I see what you have. I want that for myself. Eventually, I want that freedom. She had her office right around the corner from her kid's school and it was all just a very easy, flexible, all that yeah.

Speaker 2: 4:41

Love it. So that started this journey of going away from myself. So I got really into law and law is very structured and very like. I mean, it's the law right. It puts you in a box. That's what it's there to do, and I am very free spirited, so it like broke me to do this, but I continued on this journey anyway, no matter how much my health was suffering and I am very free spirited, so it like broke me to do this, but I continued on this journey anyway, no matter how much my health was suffering, no matter how broken I was. For 10 years I was fighting and fighting for this one career because I thought that once I achieved what I was hoping to achieve, which is just stability, then I could be creative again.

Speaker 1: 5:24

Wow, Okay, so hold on. You just said so much right there. I just want to bring you back to that one little invitation, Like do you want this? And you said yes. Did you have any inkling in that moment where there was a little nagging anything, or was it a full body?

Speaker 2: 5:38

Yes, no, it wasn't. At the time I was going through so much that I didn't even know what was right for me and what wasn't right for me. Well, that makes sense. When someone offered me what seemed like the key to freedom, I was like yes, because I didn't trust my own sense of sovereignty. I didn't trust that my intuition was going to lead me to my own idea of what freedom was for me. So I did this whole thing and I'm very passionate about equity and equality across where I've always been like an ally and an advocate, and so law felt like a natural avenue to fit that into my life.

Speaker 2: 6:17

I worked in family law, advocacy for children, advocacy for domestic violence, and my last job was at the Cochran firm, a civil rights law firm, and I was like that's my freaking dream job. But I wasn't barred in California, so I had to go get barred. I was working as paralegal. The attorney I was working for was like we're going to pay for you to go take the bar exam. This is my third time taking it in California. Third time's a charm. They paid for me to take the bar exam.

Speaker 2: 6:42

I take two weeks off before the exam because normally you're studying eight hours a day. But because I'm working full time, I didn't have the time to you know, like I didn't have that luxury, so I had to take off the last two weeks and I did so kind of abruptly. Originally I was supposed to take a month off, but then it got down to the wire. We had three trials going on and I was like I can't actually take off. So I took off abruptly. I was like, hey guys, I have to study for the bar exam. That's two weeks. I sent an email because they all knew that the exam was coming up.

Speaker 1: 7:14

You just said that they're paying for it. Right, if you're going to have an investment, don't you think you would protect it Like hello?

Speaker 2: 7:20

duh. So I do the whole thing those two weeks I'm studying and I take the bar exam Tuesday and Wednesday. I go back to work on Thursday. They fire me on Thursday. After 10 years of struggling in this career, they fired me the day after the bar exam. That's a new one. First of all, I've been pushing so hard in this one direction. Let this be the last time that I push this hard in a direction clearly not meant for me.

Speaker 1: 7:48

So did you get the results back from the test yet? Tomorrow, Tomorrow, oh my gosh, I keep running into you like the day before something big happens. That's insane. That's so interesting to me because in the manifestation circles they're always like if it's hard it's not for you, and if there's so much resistance it's not for you. But you're having things drop into your lap. You have this job with a huge law firm. You have them paying for the bar exam. On paper, this seems like the perfect fit, but I guess not.

Speaker 2: 8:19

Well, I think it's one of those things where I am very skilled at being in the right place at the right time. I don't know when it comes to that stuff, but I will say a couple of things about manifesting. I had a really traumatic life and I know that I don't carry myself that way, but it's been a long road. We all have our own struggles. If you push yourself, you can manifest anything right. You can manifest anything that's meant for you. Whether or not I think it stays is the thing.

Speaker 1: 8:50

The litmus test.

Speaker 2: 8:51

Throughout this whole time I've been seeking stability. All of these things that have been dropped into my lap have been stable, but like illusory, it's not actually stability. It's like like illusory it's not actually stability. It's like I've been placing my trust in these things that I believe are more stable than me, but then they bottom out. When I'm seeking stability, my lesson was not that these things are more stable than I am. It's that the stability has to come from within. It was like my root chakra more stable than I am.

Speaker 1: 9:25

It's that the stability has to come from within. It was like my root chakra. Hallelujah for that. I feel like that's such a huge lesson, especially right now, right, if we're looking around in survival state and anxiety with the fire hose of information coming at us. We cannot rely on the external to be our foundation. We just can't, and it's amazing that you got that lesson from all of that and amazing how long it takes us to get there. Oh my God.

Speaker 2: 10:18

Oh my God, that was my point. Some people have the luxury of learning this stuff really early because they were planted in the right environment. I don't know anybody like that, so it's fine. I think it's our millennial plight is that we're kind of like we're going to be our own foundation.

Speaker 1: 10:34

Yeah, we're going to be tested until we figure it out Exactly.

Speaker 2: 10:37

Yeah, I have a lot of friends. One of my really close friends just lost her job. On Tuesday she was let go and this has been like two years of a series of layoffs and this is her lesson. She's a therapist but she's been working for a company and I was like dude, this is your time to go on your own. You have your own clients already. You just have to flesh out your business. But it's really hard because she's a mom and the earthquake shattering of your stable foundation is just so initially shocking and disorienting that, like a lot of the people that are here right now don't know, we don't know to we, like they don't know how to handle don't know what right.

Speaker 1: 11:16

The integration of all the additional energy and information and fear and overwhelm. That's just so much. It's so much. So how did you handle that initial shock? What was your process like to get out of the shock and into the integration and then the action?

Speaker 2: 11:33

I have have really delayed emotional reactions. I think it's probably the neurodivergence in me or something I don't know. I've been trying to figure this out, but also trying not to problem solve.

Speaker 1: 11:41

For many of us it's like a little bit of trauma, a little bit of neurodivergence. It's just like a cocktail yeah.

Speaker 2: 11:46

So at first I laughed. When they told me they were firing me, they were letting me go, I was like okay, if you don't want me there. My initial reaction is just like okay, that's fine, what are?

Speaker 1: 11:56

you going to do?

Speaker 2: 11:58

And so I was like this is crazy. The exam was literally yesterday and okay, I'm going to go home. And then I took to TikTok and cried and I was like actually, I just like want all my cheerleaders. I was in shock and people showed up. I had just received TikTok reps. They connected me to the creator fund.

Speaker 2: 12:18

The CEO of the company called me through one of the representatives and she was like you got this. She was like if they can't take a joke, fuck them. And you know just the saying or whatever screw them if they can't take a joke. And she had to explain it to me ahead and I was like what do you mean? It wasn't a joke. She was like it's just a thing. But I had received all the support that it was undeniably that like, whatever direction my life was going in was the right way, regardless of what I didn't see that call as the answer to all my problems. But I was like this is a sign that I'm going in the right direction If these people, the community on TikTok, really rose up. I cried about it a lot, but mostly I've been grieving a lot because my dog died in last year and then I lost this job. It's just a very like my old life was crumbled.

Speaker 1: 13:10

Yeah.

Speaker 2: 13:11

And so I just had to accept and embrace that this is where it was going. I feel like I'm like floating down a river and I'm just going over the rapids, like this and I have no idea where I'm going. I'm bumping into shit all the time, I'm making mistakes, but the river is taking me somewhere. I'm just going and you're on the ride.

Speaker 1: 13:28

I think that's a beautiful place to be.

Speaker 2: 13:48

It is stressful because we're actively taught to swim up the current and hold on for dear life and make other people drown for our survival. So I think just that release and surrender is the thing that people just affirmations, it's just like you can get up, you can do it, and like there are some days where I'm like super numbing out, you know where. I'm just like, oh, that makes sense. I'm on the phone and I'm going for a walk. That's the most I can do all day because I'm still in a grieving spot and I freeze when I get freaked out. So do I so, so do I. So it's a lot of moving so that I don't stay and freeze.

Speaker 1: 14:14

Well, that's a perfect segue, because I believe you have a dance background. Is that true?

Speaker 2: 14:20

I do yeah, are you using it? I am Well, I trained ballerina. That was my first love in life, but I knew it was never going to be a career for me, so I had to temper my relationship with it very early. It's something I do for the love and only when I'm feeling full of love. Last year I was teaching ballet and then I lost my dog and I had to study for the bar exam, so I stopped teaching bar. I'm on a hiatus right now because it's just, it's a lot, but the discipline that it taught me I use every day. The thing that drew me to ballet is the same thing that drew me to law, which is discipline and structure. I'm a free spirit and you have to find structure in certain things. For sure it helped me. Those are my foundations. Because of ballet, I have the discipline and the persistence to keep going. I know my creative process super well because of it. When I'm tired, I just have to rest and I'll pick it back up tomorrow. I trust myself to stay in that cycle, that's huge.

Speaker 2: 15:19

But no, I'm not using it every day. That's it pretty much. It's just like the discipline and I try to be graceful but I'm a clunky, clumsy biatch.

Speaker 1: 15:28

So am I. It's very fun to be in a body. I love that you brought in the parallel between law and ballet, because that's exactly what it made me think of too. Because you are such a free spirit, it's so interesting that you have also played with and strengthened the really regimented left brain earthly rule following side of yourself too. That's so fascinating to me that you have these two very specific skill sets and backgrounds and now you're kind of in the free fall float of it, maybe inviting you to the safety of the other way of doing it.

Speaker 2: 16:09

What do you?

Speaker 1: 16:09

think.

Speaker 2: 16:10

It's scary Cause.

Speaker 1: 16:11

I don't.

Speaker 2: 16:12

I don't trust the soft. Yeah, I don't trust that it'll be strong enough to hold me, I think. But yeah, I'm learning that I had it backwards. Actually, like, what I've learned from law and ballet is discipline and rigidity for sure, but also the contrast of my free spirited nature is that I introduced some flexibility into those things too. It helps me stay balanced. I guess because I'm not stay balanced, I guess because I'm not. I think with law specifically because things are so rigid they break easily. But with softness and carefree flexibility, there is that flexibility If I hit it really hard with an attitude or something. This is what I'm feeling about being a mom. I'm not a mom, but I'm. When I imagine softness, I imagine my mom, because she was a very soft leader. What I needed from her was her ability to absorb my fear and my attitude when the world gets really hard and I'm breaking under the so to be that buffer for you.

Speaker 2: 17:31

Yeah, and I think that is what I'm settling into now is this realization that that soft thing is actually more supportive and structured and, for me, this rigid way of being I don't know if that made any sense that makes perfect sense, to me Like that is fascinating Just the fact that we get exactly the medicine and the lesson that we're needing. Yeah.

Speaker 1: 17:56

I feel like that idea just helps me get through things. You know, when it feels challenging, it's like I know I'm here to learn something very specific and it's going to feel so much better after this.

Speaker 2: 18:09

Yep.

Speaker 1: 18:10

Even though it sucks in the middle.

Speaker 2: 18:12

It really does. My therapist says you're in the messy middle and I loved the first time I'd ever heard. She was the first time I'd ever heard. That was like oh, you're just in the messy middle. But the thing that I still struggle with, no matter what, is that it's all work. Hmm, yeah even when you are being supported in your life, you still have the work. Even if someone's taking care of you in every way, you still have the work to do to get up and live your own life.

Speaker 1: 18:48

Right.

Speaker 2: 18:49

And that's work. I think it's work for everybody. The chop before enlightenment chop wood. Carry after enlightenment chop wood carry water Yep. I wanted an easy life, and none of it is easy. I think that's what I was looking for. Stability is structure and ease, and what I have been met with is always more work, and I'm like, oh, it's just because life is work.

Speaker 1: 19:13

That's an interesting reframe, but I think I went off the tangent here, no, I'm right there with you.

Speaker 1: 19:20

Here's where I'm at with everything you're saying. There's how we're taught that the world is, the world is hard, the world is scary, the world is a dangerous place, and we're also at least in the whole new age emergence of the last decade everyone's talking about. You know good vibes only, and you know, keep your attention on things that make you feel good and ignore the rest, right? So I feel like many of us are coming to a place where neither one of those approaches are fully fitting what's needed in the moment. Yep, are fully fitting what's needed in the moment, and I feel like, with the experience that you've had in law for the last 10 years, you've had a front seat to all of the changes happening. What's your take on everything right now In the US specifically.

Speaker 2: 20:06

What do you think? Okay, where do I start? I think that humanity is we're in our teens we're going to look at the whole collective humanity as one body. We're like in our teen adolescence we're we're all kind of being a little narcissistic because we can't differentiate between like ourselves and the. There's some confusion about our identity as it pertains to the rest of the world and what we're entitled to and what we're like not entitled to.

Speaker 2: 20:56

This period of time where we're pushing back against the structures that exist because it's a natural like, it's natural to grow and outgrow. The structures that have, like, kept us, you know, in an organized society. For this, for good, for better or worse, it kept us in an organized society and that organization, we're realizing, is bad for most of us, and so we're rebelling against that. But we don't know how to do that in a way that makes sense because we're still teenagers. There's a creator on TikTok called Codependency Kate, and she's amazing, amazing, um, and she was talking about how teenagers need like. They need guidance when it comes to like, where to focus their anger and growth.

Speaker 2: 21:42

We don't have a guide or a clear leader who's leading the way in a, in a heart-centered like this. The human experience is like should be and light. We don't have anybody doing that. We just have people who are like trying to control us, and I think we're all kind of at our wits end but we still don't know where to put it. So we're kind of like lashing out at content creators. We're lashing out at celebrities instead of lash, instead of like organizing and taking out that like dissatisfaction on the things that are actually harming us, we are taking it out on the spaces that can absorb it. And I said I think sometimes mystics are canaries in the coal mines, because we're very soft and we're like the mothers of humanity in some way, like I'm not not a mom but like you can still have mother energy if you are not a mom.

Speaker 2: 22:37

I think mystics, especially right now, like women, are absorbing a lot of that.

Speaker 1: 22:42

I'm on a call. Did you need something? Can you take your call car? Thanks, mom. What are we talking about?

Speaker 2: 22:52

The mystics and moms absorb. Mom. What are we talking about? Mystics and moms absorb. We take it out on the people who are safest. I think that's most of the time and most of the time women, because women absorb and we don't lash out in the same way that men do out of anger. Not in the same way.

Speaker 1: 23:09

Not in the same way. That's a big sentence right there too. Yeah, not in the same way. It's a different flavor, isn't it?

Speaker 2: 23:18

I think one is more on the offensive and the other is more on the defense 100%, and I think we're seeing that like and I sometimes hesitate to talk about this, so I'll talk about like on my TikTok, when it's just me and my screen here with you, because I think that men and women both were transcending the binary and we're figuring that Absolutely, and so it's like a men versus women thing right now, and men want to, but we all both seeing issues with how the world is like. We're just seeing them differently and different Men want to stop the population by murdering a lot of people.

Speaker 1: 23:56

Control and violence.

Speaker 2: 23:57

Control and violence, and women are like no, actually we're just going to withdraw our energy and not have babies anymore. And that's how we're going to take our control back. So it's a control struggle and I think it can seem more violent because men are not getting what they want. They're saying that we're committing violence against them by not giving them what they want, but I think it's way more peaceful the way women are approaching it.

Speaker 1: 24:22

That just makes me think of a play I majored in theater at USC, and so one play, kindred Spirit. Right, there's this one play called Lysistrata, where basically all the women band together and they're like you know what we are done with this violence? We are going to basically not put out until y'all figure your shit out and stop fighting, because we're losing our husbands, we're losing our brothers, we're losing our family members, and this is ridiculous. And I was in the shower thinking about this idea that not putting out is withholding and that is the act of violence, because our bodies are expected, they feel entitled to that exchange, not every man.

Speaker 1: 25:02

We're just talking about the patriarchy and the way that it's been for a couple of thousands of years. Okay, just back off where they exert power over others instead of reclaiming their own power. In this day and age, our job is to reclaim our own power. Get quiet and reclaim the divine feminine, the divine mother, and even in terms of Mother Earth, homegirl needs some protection. Homegirl needs some reciprocity, because look how much she's taken is just unsustainable. Some reciprocity, because look how much he's just unsustainable. And the global uprising that's coming is going to be led by women, femmes and allies Yep.

Speaker 2: 25:42

We are doing. The Dalai Lama said that.

Speaker 1: 25:44

Right it's. I don't know how much more obvious it needs to be personally, but I also sit with the reverence and sadness and disappointment and frustration. It doesn't have to be this hard, like why are we doing this? Why are so many people being hurt Meanwhile? It's just like how about be in stillness for a second and work that?

Speaker 2: 26:08

out.

Speaker 1: 26:08

How about do some healing work? How about go to therapy? How about read some books? Apparently, that's a really tall order when we've all been taught to hot potato all of our feelings and impulses and just project them everywhere else. Oh my God, which I feel is such a micro and macro thing. That's happening now, right, like everything about our current administration, is also not about accountability, not about personal responsibility, not about following the law or the constitution. It's just, oh, they're the problem. Yep, be afraid.

Speaker 2: 26:39

And what's crazy is like and I think people you know that they don't want to get quiet and go within. Because I had this problem. I don't know if maybe this was your experience too, but like when I first got quiet, if maybe this was your experience too, but like when I first got quiet, the violence went inward, Like I went from being really angry and then and, but like being in a environment where I couldn't hear my own feelings, couldn't hear my own thoughts, I didn't even know that I was angry until I lived alone and then that violence got. I couldn't escape my own head and that's when it got really bad. And I think that prevents a lot of people from getting quiet, because they think it's always going to be that way. They think that their internal language is, is static, it's never changing, it's always going to be mean. But that's where the neuroplasticity comes in. But that's where the neuroplasticity comes in. You can change your brain, you can change your thoughts, but it takes a lot of work and they don't even know that it's possible, Right.

Speaker 1: 27:42

Right.

Speaker 2: 27:44

Done studies on people's internal voices, 85 to 90% of people have heard voices in their head. When they hear those voices, it's culturally dependent. Your environment plays a huge role on the voices in your head that you hear, and in the United States it's overwhelmingly negative. In other cultures the voices in their head are positive, uplifting and encouraging.

Speaker 1: 28:10

That really tells you a lot about American culture, how we communicate through a desire to control another person's experience, and how that infiltrates everyone's psyche like a toxic cancer kind of Do you know if this study was about the energetic voices we can hear, or were they focusing on our inner self-talk, like the more acceptable version of voices in your head?

Speaker 2: 28:34

When I saw it on TikTok I was just like I'm Googling this. Is this real? Yes, and it's the psychological, so yes.

Speaker 1: 28:42

Yes to all, without differentiating between the two. That's so interesting. What we know about energy is that it meets us where we're at right. So our frequency determines what we're attracting, what we're seeing and all that Right. So it's interesting because if we're already in such a negative space, then it's not such a departure to be like well, yeah, you're attracting some not so great energies.

Speaker 2: 29:05

But I also think, like when I first saw it, I was like God, I bet you and I'm like watching this, as a white girl with a Pocahontas Barbie right behind me. I'm like, oh my God, welcome the comments. I bet you and I'm like watching this, as a white girl with a Pocahontas Barbie right behind me. I'm like, oh my God, welcome, the comments are going to come from me. It's okay, but I was thinking about how, because we're on native land and I always wonder about the mental connection to the earth and the energy that's been here for so long and I always wonder if that has something to do with it. It's like you're not supposed to be here. We're not supposed to be here. I think that is part of why we're having not a good time here.

Speaker 1: 29:49

Ooh, that's so interesting. That is an interesting take. I hadn't actually thought about that. I've heard of and sat with the energetic side of it, but not so much in terms of this is why we're having such a shitty time. It was more for me about like, oh, we have healing work to do here, which both are true, right, yeah, but I didn't think of the manifestation of everything happening as a result of the foundation being diseased. Yeah, oh, that's yeah, that makes sense.

Speaker 1: 30:17

It's funny that you mentioned Pocahontas bar, because I still can hardly see the video feed. Oh, no, it's fine, but a lot of my tune in or whatever comes in Disney language, because it's such a shorthand for me, and so I'm always thinking about, like Frozen 2, you 2, the idea of the dam must fall. Everything that we thought we knew it was all lies, the violence was not provoked, the treaty is null and void and we have to right the wrongs of the past in order to move forward. The entire premise of the film and back in 2019, when it came out, I was like, oh, this is so big, this is what we're moving into now. I had no idea how true that would be, yep, but I really do feel that that's the age of the reckoning.

Speaker 2: 31:07

I guess that we're in now. I 100% agree with you. It's like it is an age of reckoning, because we have to, we're forced now to look at the way, because what happens when, eventually, the nasty energies come for all of us is that the people who weren't affected at first now see the harm that has been caused for generations on people that were not them. But because people, especially white people, are feeling the crunch right now, they're being forced to look at the harm they've inflicted on other people. It's not pretty. They don't like it. It's ugly and it's causing chaos and mayhem and like but this, this is a part of the reckoning. You have to see it. It's really ugly, fix it now.

Speaker 1: 31:55

Yeah. So then that brings me back to another conversation I'm having with my girlfriends behind the scenes. It's like the United Color of Benetton up in here. That's with everyone, but like with people in white bodies yeah, that is quite a task, oh yeah, what? Oh yeah, tell me what's happening for you, cause I have my own flavor of the experience. But you're going to have a totally different take.

Speaker 2: 32:22

Yeah, so I'm really lucky. I grew up in a family that was very open-minded, open-hearted and diverse. I didn't have a lot of that kind of deconditioning to do because of the family that I grew up in and because I was interested in other cultures that were very different than mine from a super young age, like my grandparents. The reason I have her here is because I really connected to Native American culture when I was four years old, and so much so that my grandparents took me to powwows. I learned about this culture that was different than mine, but I really resonated with it because it was the first time I had seen that discussed about everything having a soul.

Speaker 2: 33:06

And that's what resonated with me the most. I was like that is how I see the world.

Speaker 1: 33:11

Those people get it, validating your understanding of it. How?

Speaker 2: 33:12

I see the world, validating your understanding of it. Yeah, yeah, those people got it. Personally, didn't struggle with the same things as a lot of my white friends did, but when I realized that not all white people were the same way, that was really hard is because I've that was. You know, here I am, I'm an ally. I don't understand why you guys think that you're better than everybody else when obviously that's literally not true. It's actually you just take everything and then say that you're better.

Speaker 2: 33:43

So, like it didn't make sense, my work has been asking white people really hard questions and also removing myself from situations that aren't going to change. I have to remove myself from this energy that pisses people off more than being confrontational, because staying in the system, yeah, because they feel entitled to an argument, because they feel like they know better. But as soon as you stop talking, like if I plead my case, you're not listening, but I'm like, actually I'm gone because you're fucked listening, but I'm like, actually I'm gone because you're fucked up Then they have to look in the mirror and they have to be like, okay, why is that? And that has happened to my family a lot. That's caused a lot of ripple effects. So, like anytime I go home now and we talk about politics, it's a very different conversation because I was like I've been saying the same stuff for years and you guys only saw it because I removed myself from the energy.

Speaker 1: 34:40

How are the conversations different, would you say now?

Speaker 2: 34:43

They're far more accepting, far more open-minded. That's a relief. I was worried they were going to go the other way, far more open-minded, I think, because I was such a bitch about it for so long. And then I was just like, if you're not going to accept that this is actually the truth, yeah. And then the narratives started coming in, like, oh, this is true. They started feeling the pinches of reality. I remember having a conversation one time with a family member I won't say which one. It was like an abortion conversation. I'm just using this as an example.

Speaker 1: 35:18

Being fairly neutral, as those conversations go, yeah, way to pick a safe one.

Speaker 2: 35:26

Let's just go right in. And he was like that's why they're wiping out generations of people. The cure for cancer could have been in the mind of one of those babies. And I was like you have no idea, it could have been in the mother. Now those conversations are so much different. There's curiosity and instead of being like well, that's wrong, it's like maybe there's something I don't understand there. And then there that opens up the gray area to then have that conversation.

Speaker 1: 35:54

Yeah, just to have that door open is huge.

Speaker 2: 35:56

Yeah, but that's been my experience with white people specifically. It's like banging your fucking head against a wall. We're trying to talk to these people sometimes because you only can see your experience.

Speaker 1: 36:11

Yeah, unless you're curious about anybody else's. How do you grow? It's like leave your hometown as soon as you can, because there's a whole world out there, exactly. And then you come home and everything's different. But nothing's different. You're different.

Speaker 2: 36:22

Yeah, exactly. People in the United States are so tired and overworked that they can't even fathom being curious about something that they don't understand, probably by design. Exactly and I think it's only getting worse right now, which is why they're squeezing us so hard is they want to create more divide? Yeah, yeah, I don't think any of their foreign policies are meant to hurt anyone except for us. What's happening in the US is violence against its people.

Speaker 1: 36:54

Wow, I hadn't actually thought of it that way, because it's sold to us as the opposite. Yeah.

Speaker 2: 37:00

But I think when you I don't know if you've been in a relationship with a narcissist, but I was married to one, and anytime they're saying that, it's always the opposite of what they're saying.

Speaker 1: 37:12

Like the truth.

Speaker 2: 37:13

Yeah, the truth is the opposite of what they're saying. Colonialism is narcissism on a grand scale.

Speaker 1: 37:21

Oh, I hadn't actually extrapolated that. Okay, hold on, give me a second. Whoa, all right. Yeah, yep, that makes sense. That totally tracks you.

Speaker 2: 37:34

Yeah, I don't want any part of that? No, me neither. It's because you're going into some someone else's culture and saying your culture's invalid. Take my culture instead. Like who the fuck does that?

Speaker 1: 37:47

assholes, but it's like the way that we all grew up, like we were just sold this beautiful promise of a free nation and you could do whatever you like. It's such a what is it? Cognitive dissonance, yep. What we grew up with and the truth of what was actually happening just does not match. It's such a brain break to try to understand what's real, yep, and I think we're in the finding out of what's real now, oh, totally.

Speaker 1: 38:18

But you know what? Here's what's hopeful. This just came to me while I was washing dishes this morning. In that cognitive dissonance, we've basically also brainwashed our generation of kids to think this way. We are deserving of liberty in the pursuit of happiness. We are deserving of equality and equity among all people. We all grew up this way, and so to find out, wait a second, that's not actually how it is. Okay. But we're not going to settle though. No, because you told me this is how it is. Yep, and that's my expectation, moving forward, exactly, exactly, that's exciting it is.

Speaker 2: 38:56

I hope that I really hope because what I learned in law school? I went to a public interest law school, so it was very geared towards changing the legal field as it is and making it more equitable and also changing the laws to not be as oppressive as they are, and that's that's school's goal. That's why I picked it. I was like I want to change the world, but one of their biggest like shoot. I lost my train of thought. You said brainwashing, hope, hope and the the pursuit of everything is one of those things where, yes, that's the idea and we want to keep that idea, but build new structures in place. So you know what Trump is doing now. It's a crumbling of the whole thing that scares me, because there are still good structures in place. We just have to open them up, right, like there's a lot of them that are just closed and not available to people and the laws are oppressive. But the idea was good, it's just the execution that's been really bad.

Speaker 2: 40:03

I didn't realize when I went to law school just how many of our laws are like, how the oppression is literally written into our laws. I thought it was a social thing for a very long time I thought racism was a social thing, until I went to law school and learned that it's codified. Yeah, wow. And so you have to have how much needs to change legally in order to make that possible? Is the thing that people have been saying isn't possible to change? But when I'm watching Donald Trump literally just crumble everything in sight, I'm like, ok, it was possible, you just didn't want to do it or you couldn't do it. You cared about the bureaucracy more than the change, right. And this person doesn't care about the bureaucracy, only wants to change. But it's for bad To benefit them Instead of benefiting everybody, right.

Speaker 1: 40:54

We are at a crossroads and I don't believe in mistakes or coincidences. So the fact that you do have a connection spiritually, soul level, you have intuitive gifts. You are pursuing work in that field now because, basically, you've been forced to Hello, thanks universe, and also you have all this knowledge and this background in law and it's very relevant and important and crucial to what's happening now. That is such a combo.

Speaker 2: 41:27

I know I actually was last night. I was in my bed, I was making a TikTok. It was a shit post. I'm not going to post it. But at the end I was like it's nice to get that energy out though. Yeah, exactly, Exactly. But I was like do I have to get into politics? Oh shit, Nobody wants to do that. If I go, I'm going kicking and screaming.

Speaker 1: 41:44

I'm excited to see what happens for you there, Like, of course you're making me do this universe Come on.

Speaker 2: 41:49

Yeah, I get it now, but I don't actually think so. I'm going in it, but I don't know.

Speaker 1: 41:54

Well, politics adjacent, I don't know. There's always something that benefits future self, right? I'm interested to see how it's all woven together as you move through it Me too. Thank you, what a web, what a web man. Okay, so before we log off, I want to get to the very beginning for the door opening experience. Did you have a big aha like? Oh my gosh, this is like magic behind the scenes that I have access to these soul senses. Was it a gradual thing, like awakening story?

Speaker 2: 42:32

Oh, yeah, it was. It was a gradual thing. My mom says she's like, you came out fully formed, you knew who you were and you were safe in your intuition, like in your imaginary world they would call it. But I lost it because I life, yeah, Um, and I locked that part of me away and especially so, came in fully formed and then you lost it at 18 or yeah like 1819. I got really, I really like shut and locked the door. Yeah, honestly, really.

Speaker 2: 43:05

Yeah it's a really hard and confusing time and I got lost and swept into an abusive situation. I dissociated for years, pretty much, and then in law school I met one of my best friends and she introduced me to the psychic who her name is, Mystic Michaela, and she talks about auras and their colors and that's how she describes energy. And when I was listening to her podcast I was like wait, I didn't know that this was special. I thought everybody saw this. I don't see colors, but I have synthesization other ways, Like I, you know, I saw that it was a legit thing. I started to explore it more. It's been a slow, gradual unraveling of like oh, it's been a remembering. I'm like, okay, this happened and that's why that happened, and I'm like putting the puzzle pieces back together. But thank God for women and thank God for nonjudgmental women, because my circle got really small when I was going through the initial exploration phase.

Speaker 2: 44:09

That is such a common thing.

Speaker 1: 44:11

What a parallel right. The awakening side of it and the healing from narcissism side of it. You really are questioning yourself. You're questioning your own sanity, You're questioning reality as a whole. What do I believe in? What is true, how? Do I reconcile what I know to be true with what I'm not seeing in my 3D, all of these questions, it's like picking at a scab, almost, I feel.

Speaker 2: 44:37

It really is, and I think that's why people fall into spiritual psychosis a lot, because everything you know changes and your brain's making new connections that aren't always correct or the right connections, and that gets really confusing for people and if you don't have like a guide and even if it's just a podcast that you're listening to with a spiritual girly on, the other end.

Speaker 2: 45:02

Exactly like that helps, that helps you, everything helps when you're on that journey. Or just like, okay, there's a guiding light there, here's what this person did and here's how I can apply that to my life.

Speaker 1: 45:14

Exactly All I did was just like oh my gosh, I'm so grateful for the fact that this is more mainstream than it used to be anyway, because it was so hush, hush before. This was so like embarrassing, cringe, shameful, you know, scary. Oh, that's the devil, oh, that's a demon. And now it's like, oh no, it's the most human thing you could possibly do. It's a natural extension of learning about yourself and learning about your life and deciding how you want to live. It's so natural.

Speaker 2: 45:44

It makes perfect sense. We all experience spirituality in different ways. It's interesting when you get to know yourself how that blossoms for you. And I think that that's really exciting for each individual person. That should be the incentive to inner exploration. What does that blossom into? What are your psychic gifts when you really get to know yourself? How are you reading subtle?

Speaker 1: 46:02

energies. We're on completely the same page. I think it's just such an adventure of discovery. The 3D version would be like what's your favorite color, what's your favorite food, what's your go-to study habit? Right Like it's the gateway to figuring out what your psychic gifts are, who you are and how you operate energetically. That's the process I bring my students through. If you're a visual learner, for example, then chances are you're clairvoyant yeah, chances are you have vivid dreams. Chances are you enjoy art and you're creative visually. So all of those things have such powerful correlations and I think it's so much fun and so fascinating to go exploring.

Speaker 2: 46:41

When you're in people's psychic worlds, what are the gifts that you most often see? Is it clairvoyance?

Speaker 1: 46:51

Clairvoyance, clairsentience is a really big one and clairaudience, I would say, in that order. However, I believe that all of us have our own specific like blueprint, fingerprint of a combination of it and the way that I teach it it's so fun, I get to bring in all my theater background stuff. All your clear senses are your vocabulary words, because intuition is a language and we all have our own distinct combination of strengths and how they show up is our dialect and so when we speak this language of intuition, it's in, like it's a receiving and it's a output. You know it's speaking, yep. So we all have our own different way of connecting and interpreting energy through all those channels and together it's like our own version.

Speaker 2: 47:40

Our own dictionary of intuition Is that awesome, I love it and it's so funny. As you're saying this, I'm like, of course it's theater girls, because what is drilled into us when you're young, your body is your instrument. When that's been drilled into your head, your body is your instrument. It just takes a little bit of tweaking to be like oh, there's also subtle information that I'm getting and I think, because maybe we've been there and explored, I wonder about that connection all the time, especially with, like, actors and alchemists because it's emotional alchemy at the same time, you know.

Speaker 1: 48:15

It is, yeah, it is so, even with what you just said, when we've been taught that our body is an instrument, and what you were saying earlier with how having teachers having guides on this path is so important, our experience of the lesson and of what we're learning is so contingent on where that teacher is, because we could have also gotten the ballet teacher version. That's really punitive and really judgmental, just the old school version of it, right? Oh yeah, and also we're seeing in real time how the spirituality to alt-right pipeline is such a big thing, right. It's just this beautiful thing, this beautiful opportunity that then human with their unhealed, scrubby hands come in and just like fuck it up for the rest of us. So I feel like these conversations are so important to be having, because it the spirituality to things that people interact with in the real world.

Speaker 2: 49:32

I think that is what is lacking with the spiritual community like to heart and soft stuff is that there's a lack of structure. But with you guys and you're teaching, you know, and you're taking students, you're introducing that structure to spirituality that didn't exist before in a new way, and I think that that's so important in combating, like, because you have the teacher, because you have the guide, it's so important to combat the alt-right pipeline with the structure of hey, you can build a heart-centered life. It looks different than that stuff over there, but that's the point and there's still structure here. We just have to make it and it looks a little different, but what you guys are doing is important work, thank you.

Speaker 1: 50:23

I think we all need to do it in our own way, because all of us girls are having our little moon circles and hanging out on Marco Polo and whatever, and we're having these conversations. So I just feel like, well, why not share them, you know, because we're all having them, that's true.

Speaker 2: 50:37

Thank you. Thank you. It's so good, especially as you go into hiding for so long. I did yeah, yeah, no, me too that as soon as I came out you were here. I have my other friend, lindsay, like you guys, met me with such open arms and I'm so grateful. So thank you so much for having me on and being so welcoming and lovely, truly, because I really admire the coaching work. I can't do one-on-one work in the same way. It's really not healthy for me. I get lost in the weeds. So I really admire what you guys are doing and getting in the weeds with people and taking that on and getting in the dirt digging around.

Speaker 1: 51:18

Yeah, somebody's gotta, and the payoff is huge, is it? It is, it's huge, and I just feel like we all have our own strengths and weaknesses and I don't believe that there is a job too small for the soul level revolution. I feel like if we just tap into where our gifts are and where we're being led, we're going to automatically be used for a greater purpose. I believe that wholeheartedly.

Speaker 2: 51:44

I agree, I'm trying to witness it, you know. I think you are witnessing it.

Speaker 1: 51:51

You're already doing it, thanks, thanks. Thank you for having me, thank you for being here. I so appreciate you taking time out of your day and please keep us posted with where you're going and what you're doing, because messy middle is is the magic.

Speaker 2: 52:08

Yeah, I have a book. I wrote a book and it's going to be released tomorrow, literally on the same day that I find out whether or not I pass the bar exam.

Speaker 1: 52:15

No mistakes, no coincidences. Is that not so huge, oh my gosh.

Speaker 2: 52:21

So hopefully it could be a wash One thing's great, the other thing's shitty. It could be both great, it could be both crappy.

Speaker 1: 52:31

I believe in both good they're going to be exactly what they are. Oh my gosh, that's so cool. Just the synchronicity of that is already such a message for you. Yeah, wild, wow, that's amazing, all right, well, on that note, yeah, I think we're right, exactly where we're supposed to be, right when we're supposed to be there. And what more do you want, exactly? Thank you so much. Virtual hug Allison. Thank you for listening to Soul Level Human. If this episode moved something in you, share it, text it to a friend, post to your stories. The Soul Level Revolution spreads one brave human at a time, and your voice makes a difference. So until next time, remember to slow down, tune in, trust your guidance and keep having the audacity to choose the highest timeline. When you show up fully, you give others permission to do the same. Make this the timeline where you show up.